The Flintstones Internet of Living Things

Even in this technological age (or maybe because of it), The Flintstones remains a powerful piece of pop culture. Far from the animated Honeymooners rip-off, it began as the chronicles of the modern stone-age family is the swinging sixties grandfather of all adult cartoons like The Simpsons and Family Guy. It’s a part of the wonderful Hanna-Barbera universe and has inspired everything from vitamins to John Goodman live-action movies to Shmoo crossovers to a surprisingly woke new comic book.

One of the best worldbuilding running jokes on The Flintstones is its menagerie of animal-powered appliances. Stuffing dirty dishes into a pelican’s mouth because dishwashers don’t exist may look like animal cruelty and/or slavery. But that bird don’t mind. Along with being amusing visual gags, the animal appliances help further the central metaphor of The Flintstones that the seemingly hyper-modern and automated world of the then-contemporary 1960s really isn’t that different from primitive, savage, caveman times.

These days the most modern technology you can get is a smart device. Whether it’s a hairbrush or a trash can, everything is connected to the internet in some way. And digital assistants give these devices voices and personality. But what smart device has more personality than a dinosaur that mows your lawn or a bird that plays your records? So while we wait for Siri and Alexa to start saying “It’s a living,” here are our favorite examples of the Flintstones Internet of Living Things.

Pterodactyl Airplane

Who needs a pilot when the plane itself is a living thing with a brain and a soul?

Pelican Dishwasher

Certain animal mouths are cleaner than human mouths, so washing dishes inside of pelicans makes more sense than you’d think.

Sawfish Knife

Sea creatures are some of the weirdest creatures in the world, so if you told me people actually use sharks as knives in the real world, I’d believe you.

Dinosaur Lawnmower

This dinosaur doesn’t seem too happy eating grass. Maybe it’s because its sharp teeth are made for eating meat instead?

Turtle Drum Set

This is perhaps the cruelest machine on this entire list. Beat a turtle with sticks solely for your own amusement. The turtle looks happy, but it’s begging for death.

Rabbit Brush

Using a rabbit’s bushy tail to apply makeup works in theory, but do you really want to wipe an animal’s butt on your face to look pretty?

Pig Garbage Disposal

This is kind of a win-win. The family gets rid of unwanted food, and the pig gets a nice meal.

Woolly Mammoth Hose

Trunks are one of the more versatile organic appliances in the Flintstones world. Along with being hoses, they’re also used as vacuum cleaners.

Brontosaurus Crane

Turning a huge and mighty dinosaur into a tool for changing the very land itself reflects the triumph of mankind in the world of the Flintstones.

Woodpecker Camera

A normal camera captures the world as it is, but a “photo” carved by a woodpecker has an artist’s touch.

Turtle/Bird Record Player

The turtle gets a raw deal, but if the bird has any ambition, it could take this opportunity to show off its sick DJ skills.

Lizard Can Opener

Fun fact, you have to replace these lizard can openers pretty often since the soda erodes their crucial buck teeth.

Lighters

Although it got more kid-friendly as it went on, The Flintstones began as a revolutionary primetime cartoon for adults. And nothing is more adult than pulling out a lighter and having a smoke.